Katherine's Hair Memories, Part One

 After begging my mom for a perm, and being told over and over that I didn't need one; but how can that be, everybody had one, she relented. The pull for me was that you could get you hair wet and it would still be straight. Once I had my hair "permed" (I soon learned there was nothing permanent about it), I go home, jump in the shower to shampoo my hair. I look down and there is my hair, swirling around my feet in the tub! Well, I don't have to tell you that was my first and last "perm"; it took years to get my hair back to a healthy state. Once my hair grew back, I still wanted my hair to be straight, so I started relying on the press and curl. No one can tell me they enjoyed sitting for hours getting a hot comb and melting grease applied to your crown. Or getting your ear singed just enough to leave evidence as to how adept your Mother was with the hot comb, and the worst burn of them all-across the forehead, but at least you could hide it with your bangs!

As time went on and I learned more about myself and my hair, I started cutting my hair down to a short Afro, I changed my diet, and stayed as chemical free as possible. My daughter's hated my all natural stance* and I felt as if history were repeating itself. I, like my mother, told my daughters that they didn't need relaxers and them, like I did years before, pleading with me that everyone has one so they too needed a "perm".

I learned all the old hair secrets we were told needed to go out the window. I learned our hair is strong, yet delicate. It can be incredibly thick and impossibly fine at the same time and that kinky/curly hair should never be brushed while wet. The products available to us, from the turn of the 20th century to the turn of the 21st, were designed to make our hair conform to Eurocentric standards of hair and beauty. From heavy petroleum products made to bring shine and sheen to hair robbed of its natural luster to gels filled with alcohols that plaster hair into cement-like structures. Through the generations we have tortured ourselves and our hair chasing after a look that doesn't often occur naturally in the black community-straight hair.

Because of this torture, many black men and women believe many of the myths that surround our locks. If taken care of properly, your hair will grow, it is managable and can look absolutely fabulous in its natural state. We just need to be more accepting of our hair, ourselves and each other and as with so many other things, educations is key. For you naturals out there, share your information, trials and tribulations with those that inquire about transitioning from relaxed to natural or getting locks. We've let other folks tell us what is best for our hair for too long. Peace and Love to you all.


*Ahem, as one of Katherine's daughters I want to say that we didn't "hate" her all natural way of life (we know our mom is a tree-hugging hippie), we just thought her Afro was SO '70's and we were living in the age of huge shoulder pads and Dynasty-the '80's! The Afro was cool again with us in the '90's since we were all getting back to our roots via Arrested Development (the group, not the TV show) and Spike Lee movies. Just kidding! The 1990's really were an important time where many young black people revisited the struggles of the past, examining exisiting rascism and pondering what we could make of the future.